Have you ever felt the clear marking of time, the knowing you are in the next chapter of your life? I got to have that experience last week when I went to pick up my childhood BFF from the airport, and the 7 days that followed. We have been friends since we were 5, met in first grade at Palisades Elementary School, and have been soul sisters ever since.
My drive to the airport was almost an out of body experience, but maybe more of a realization that WOW, here we are….52 years of life…as kindred spirits. I think the one thing that hit me the hardest, that caused tears on the GW Parkway, was the fact that we might talk about our parents getting older and what comes with that reality. I love to avoidance and denial for things like this, but if there is anyone I could do this with, it would be her. The relief I felt when I jumped out of my car, yelling her name, waving my hands like a maestro on too much Sudafed, and finally melting into her arms was palpable.
We have been though so much together over the decades….from doing back bends on her front lawn for hours, to collecting hello kitty puffy stickers, to having our first “boyfriends” be twin brother (we were in 4th grade)……to facing mean girls, life altering accidents, growing up into women, and even when we have lived 2,670 miles apart, we have, for 52 years stayed closely connected…through marriages, through my 3 kids being born, her 1 kid being born, newborn stages, toddler phases, and teen crazes, 2 disgusting divorces, illnesses, depression, addiction, complete and total tragedies….and everything in between.
But here we are…ready to set off on a 6 day getaway together, just me and her…no men, no kids, no pets, no responsibilities, except to spend this time together in gratitude and peace. And guess what? We were the luckiest twin stars in the universe….everything flowed, was simple, was quiet (unless we were laughing- we both have LOUD laughs)…we watched birds, we watched Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour doc, we marveled at the little things- the hydrangeas in full bloom, her art work on the walls of my get-away house (she drew all 3 of my kids!!!), a tiny, blue lizard in a lavender field, the breeze when it blew, the fact that she had never had to hide in a closet due to tornado threats, the lightning, and thunder, the me showing her all of my favorite spots in my get-away town, the list goes on.
One thing that was very clear, and funny and not funny all at once was the undeniable fact that our bodies and minds were not like they used to be. The up close viewing of her watching me try to get up off the floor with no grace, the noises we make when we get in and out of the car, the “how can this be a hot flash”, to her walking 10 steps behind me and looking back to see her telling her left hip to please cooperate. I also must say that I heard the phrase, “but that burned in the fire” from her and it took my breath away each and every time. That realization that her parents whole life, her whole life , and her child’s whole life were taken from them in a matter of hours……our elementary school, my old Kagawa St. house, whole neighborhoods, whole histories, all of it…gone.
We were driving and she started laughing, I look over at her, and she says, “G-d, I can’t believe how I can still remember in detail, the two of us, standing on a street corner in the alphabet streets (where we both lived), and you saying something funny, and me peeing in my pants cuz I was laughing so hard.” She clarified with replacing the word pants with gauchos, because, you know, that was the thing then. We may or may not still pee in our gauchos, but for different reasons. And the fact that both of can walk into a room, in partial panic and say, “FUCK, where are my glasses (on you head) and where is my phone (in your pocket)?” but so clearly remember laughing to the point of soaked gauchos is kind of incredible.
It seems obvious now that we watch The Eras Tour together this trip, because this was sort of like our own eras tour- walking back through the decades together, souls open and understood by each other…so much so that we can finish each other’s sentences, as well as just make a sound with a possible hand gesture and we know exactly what the other is saying.
It was a trip of a life time, truly. When I dropped her off this morning to fly back to CA, I sang (screamed) to a song that felt so perfect….these lyrics, “I said remember this moment, in the back of my mind….” and, “I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you.” Long Live. That’s the song. That’s our story. That’s US. I LOVE YOU, A!
PS- Attention all Palisades people (actually to include Santa Monica, Venice, Mar Vista, Brentwood, Westwood, West Hollywood)….If you knew/know us, we talked about you (in a good way, of course) Here are some Pali Elementary pics to drop jaw over. Enjoy. And don’t ask me why i colored over some of the boy’s faces. Thanks.
Little Truth Tales 